WhiteEyebrows

Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it.

- George Bernard Shaw

I left the United States for the first time in 2000 to spend two years in Sao Paulo, Brazil doing Missionary service for my church. To take you back, this was before the average American even knew what a Muslim was and before Osama Bin Laden was a household name.

When I returned in August of 2002, something had drastically changed about my country. Flags flew on many more houses that usual. There were flags everywhere!  Some enterprising guy had also created a novel American Flag lapel pin which everyone seemed to be sporting. People had somehow become much more proud of their country than I’d ever seen them, and more willing to do anything for it.

Then it dawned on me.  I totally missed 9/11. Continue reading “Patriotism”

Last night on So You Think You Can Dance, contemporary dance ruled the evening!  We now have a few more one word reference dances.  You know, those are the ones like the “table” or “bench” routine that we can all just say one word and remember the dance.  We now have the “shirt” routine and the “mattress” routine.

So here are the videos from last night’s 3 amazing contemporary routines: Continue reading “SYTYCD - Top 14″

And Thus We Were Manipulated
Why Mormon Pop Music and CES Videos Bug Me

A while ago, on my way home from church, I was listening to a mix CD of Sunday music. When the song “His Hands” came on, I quickly pressed the next button, but unfortunately it was too late… the other person in my car had identified the tune. “I LOVE that song… why did you change it?” they said. So I was forced to go back and let them listen to it.

It took the rest of the trip home to try and explain the following:

Growing up, I listened to a lot of Mormon pop music. A lot. It mostly grew out of the fact that I often sang in church, so I tended to listen for new material, and to be part of that universe. I was practically an authority on all things Perry or Cope.

Continue reading “And Thus We Were Manipulated”

There’s an old saying:

If you got it, flaunt it.

Well, friends, countrymen (and especially countrywomen in this case), in today’s blog I am going to make a case why if you got it, please refrain from flaunting it.

Continue reading “If You Got It, Please Refrain from Flaunting It”

Well, the title says it all for this one… Today I’ll be extolling the awkwardness that ensues when you run across those ’special’ individuals who are tragically smitten with this deadly combination of personality traits.  Yes friends, I’m talking about when, in a single individual, those two mighty forces of “I say stupid things” and “I can’t manage to keep my mouth shut” join forces to create the most awkward social situations. I call this affliction “StupidMouth”.

Continue reading “The Tragic Combination of “Stupid” and “Loudmouth””

Maybe someone who is more in tune with British customs can tell me why Nigel offered the audience “Soup and Blankets” tonight.  I thought it was hilarious, but I totally didn’t get it.

Continue reading “SYTYCD - Top 16″

As most boys do, we enjoyed a little rough-housing with my dad when we were little.  The rough housing endgame was usually one of three torture mechanisms:

1. The Whose-Gow, where your head gets clamped in between Dad’s legs.
2. The Nevada Torture, where Dad pins your arms down with his knees while poking his finger into your chest.
3. Whisker Pie, where Dad rubbed the stubble from his face all over you like sand paper.

We knew that if Dad could get us into one of these positions, the fight was over and we would have to yield, so our main goal was to stay out of the Whose-Gow, Nevada Torture, or Whisker Pie.

Well, I feel like the universe currently has me in all three of these at the same time…  And what am I referring to?

Gas Prices!

Continue reading “The Whose-Gow, Nevada Torture, and Whisker Pie”