First of all, let me apologize for my lack of posting in this fine month of August. I realize that many of you rely on WhiteEyebrows.com for your daily dose of propaganda, intellectual stimulation, humor and mirth, and so I profusely apologize for the acute absence of said things this past week. (Especially the mirth)
This blog is going to be a bit of a scattered catch-up (as opposed to a Catsup or Ketchup).
What I Did Over My Summer Vacation
Loyal blog followers will know that I was gone for the last 2 weeks on my “summer vacation.” I put that in quotes because it becomes somewhat less of an adventure when you’re an adult than when you were a kid. I remember summer vacations that were full of surprise, excitement, and long hours in a small car. But for some reason, those vacations were less stressful than the relatively painless ones I now take by myself to visit family.
The fun level of my vacation started quite high and tapered down from there. But I did succeed in my goal of 1) stimulating the economy in 3 states, 2) eating cafe rio and in and out burger as much as humanly possible, and 3) spending quality time with my family.
Going on vacation, though, did remind me how much I missed my home here in TX. By home I don’t mean house. I mean my home. My family and friends here. The feeling that of all those other places I went, this is where I belong. There’s no better feeling than coming home, and as my brother would say, “crapping on your own toilet.”
Highlights of the Vacation
- Flying to Cali next to a very talkative, very attractive young lady.
- Going to Wicked with Mom for her birthday
- Walking halfway from the Pantages Theater toward the Chinese Theater and realizing that it was WAY too far!
- Eating Shrimp on the barbie with frequent commenter Tio.
- Swimming with my nieces for endless hours under the mild California sun…
- Seeing my old friends, and finding out that the grass isn’t necessarily greener on the other side… just a different shade of green.
- Seeing Les Mis and wondering how Valjean could get through that show without dying of heat stroke.
- Cafe Rio. ’nuff said.
- Going to my mom’s work and seeing my biggest American Idol fan club. Go SWIM!
- Dropping in on my brother at the butcher’s counter and watching him sell meat to every little old lady in a motorized cart who passed by.
- Watching my other brother work on 3 cars at once.
- Single-handedly convincing each family member who could to come up to the ranch Thursday night. (one of my super-powers)
- 4-wheeling up to the mountain above the ranch, then taking a leak in the cool mountain air.
- Arriving at my sister’s new house after her ward and in-laws had already moved all of the heavy boxes and furniture into the house! (I was on babysitting duty for the 4 girls… you tell me which was the harder job…)
- Whole house humidifier at TLS’ new house… I will visit more often just based on this fact alone!
- Jewish Pork Chops! Thanks TLS!
- Wanting to jab the American Airlines attendant in the eyeball when I realized that my flight was canceled.
- Flying home next to a guy who watched a movie on his iPhone the whole way… AHHHGGGHGHG the JEALOUSY! That guy is lucky TSA confiscated anything that I might be able to use to jab him in the neck and steal his iPhone3G.
- Arriving home to an URGENT email asking me to call my boss because he had a new project that was going to monopolize my life for the next 48 hours…
And with that… we’re in it again!
I’ve Got Gas
You’ve noticed that gas has gone down in price? Oil is now back under $120/barrel. All of the oil speculators are running away with their tail between their legs. And guess what, America? We did it! Congratulations on showing the world (and ourselves) that we can actually decrease the demand for gas! While some of the price drop can be attributed to speculators leaving the market, the reason why they are leaving is beacuse of the drop in demand. Who knew you didnt’ have to drive your 13mpg monstrosity to work every day!?! Congrats!
I Lack the Power
My power bill hit an all-time high this month… $320. My eyes popped out of my head when I saw the bill. What is going on here?! And so begins my love-hate relationship with you, Mr. A/C.
Before this month, we had been best friends. We played together in the summer sun, sharing our innermost thoughts and feelings, giving each other life, and living together in a harmonious and mutually beneficial way. But this month, you have betrayed our relationship. You are now sucking the lifeblood out of me, and you have made me deathly reliant on you. You are on notice…
But not to forget…
You… Mr. Afternoon Sun. I’m coming after you next!