Obama will give you donuts


Thank you to all those who contacted me regarding yesterday’s post, and who offered their passionate support for their candidate of choice. No one actually offered cash though, so I was resigned to making up my own mind on this…

I decided to stop in to vote on my way to work this morning, rather than doing it on my way home. The logic seemed sound that more people would be voting later in the day, and I’d face less adversity by holding my nose and getting it done in the morning… wrong idea. The place was packed! It was like an elementary school carnival – lines everywhere, people sad and confused. I was just lacking the little kids crying.

I’m not going to tell you who I voted for, because… well… I don’t know. (Why do we not tell people who we voted for, anyway?) I have made no qualms about making my preferences made known up until this point in the race, so I guess I don’t want to share because it’s not a vote I’m proud of. I made a purely “political strategery” move…

So instead I just want to share a few little observations from the polls.

Obama will give you donuts: The only people smiling or enjoying themselves was a couple of Obama campaign volunteers on the sidewalk outside the polling location who were giving away free donuts and coffee to the voters. To fully appreciate this, you have to realize that last night we had a freak snow storm that came through and dropped 3″ on North Texas. Texans don’t do ice and snow. It was 33 degrees when I entered the polling place, but they were there giving out their donuts. So the conclusion? Obama supporters are nuts. Obama will give the whole country donuts.

Hillary was no where to be seen: No campaign signs, no supporters trying to sway undecideds, and definitely no donuts. And yet Hillary is still neck and neck in the polls? I think this is because it’s not cool to be a Hillary supporter anymore. Everyone who is anyone is a Barack supporter now… so the poor Hillary lovers are forced to be closet supporters lest they get attacked by the Obama crazies.

Will the Huckleheads please go home: As I saw people leaving the Republican door, I wondered… why are they even here? Are they all just coronating McCain? Or are they here to cast a vote against John McCain? If so, that means they are likely voting for TV Evangelist Chucklebee. I had to seriously resist the urge to break their legs and fingers at that very moment.

Never catch the eye of a Ron Paul supporter: There were one or two who were coming out of the polling location when I was going in. They scared me. Of course, they were partially dressed in camo (and boy-howdy they really needed an undershirt or “bro”), and probably came with their gun rack in the back of their truck filled up with their highest power weapons, just in case they needed to protect their freedom. Should you find yourself in this situation, just look at the floor and start muttering the preamble to the Constitution, and they’ll leave you alone.

Republicans are better looking than Democrats: …or at least they get more ‘dolled up’ to go to the polls in the morning. I’m telling you, there were some HOT ones coming through the republican side. The Dems had more of a ‘homely’ bunch… lots of obvious school marms and shut-ins. (No offense to the school marms and shut-ins who read this blog) I actually first noticed this by watching the election judges. On both sides, they were all older ladies. The republicans were the typical Texas belles, with their hair recently done up, nice makeup, looking professional, efficient and elite. The dems were all kind of lumpy… with bed head (not the really cool, hip kind) and large facial moles (ok, I made that part up).

It pays to be disabled: There was a sign on the door that said, if you are unable to stand in line, pull to the curb and honk your horn. THANK HEAVENS no one actually did this while I was there, or there would have been a good old fashioned riot led by yours truly. Why should you get to go to the front of the line, just cause you are so overweight that your own knees can’t support the weight of your large backside?? grrrr…

Though we’re the world’s most advanced society, our voting system is incredibly antiquated. First you stand in the line to get your name found in the book. Then you sign the book. Then they pass your ID and voter card over to the election judge. Then you wait in the 2nd line to get your ballot. Then the election judge writes your name (manually) on some carbon copy triplicate form (so I guess the only qualification for this job is to have good handwriting and to look ornery), then hands you a ballot. Then you stand in line for a voting machine. Then you stand in line to turn in your ballot, which they actually just stuck in a pile on the top of the table. No ballot box! How am I to know my vote won’t get overwritten or …oops… knocked onto the floor!?! What happened to the security of the ballot box with the super official looking lock on it?

Gimme a What-What for the Bruthuhs and the Sistahs: The line for the Democrat primary was probably 80% african-american. I’m so glad they are coming out in force! You could tell, for many, it was their first primary, and probably their first vote ever. I’m happy that the Dems have such a closely contested race. I’m glad that they have two live ones! I just wish the republicans just had ONE live one… is that too much to ask? Sigh… However, if there’s one thing about this Obama, it’s that they figured out how to get new people into the system.

Time to hit the showers: I will tell you this about my vote… I walked into the polling place undecided. I stood in both the democrat and republican line. I talked to both election judges, both of whom scowled at my independence and quite openly wondered to themselves why I wasn’t a party hack for either side. I held my nose and cast my ballot. I voted for someone I really don’t want to be President. And now it’s time to hit the showers. I feel slightly dirty by the trick I pulled, but it was the only option, with My Man Mitt out of the race.

Hopefully in November I’ll feel better about the ballot I cast.

So just for fun… reply to this post with who YOU think I voted for.  Maybe I’ll tell you, maybe I won’t…

8 thoughts on “Obama will give you donuts”

  1. Why should we tell you who we think you voted for if you won’t tell us if we’re right? Either
    way, I think you voted for Obama.

  2. I know you voted for Osama. He was giving out donuts and you would sell your soul for a donut.

  3. I voted for my man Mitt. I know that his campaign’s “ship has sailed,” but I just couldn’t bring myself to vote for any of the other names on the ballot. Every time my marker got even remotely close to McCain’s bubble, my arm would lock up … making me look like him with my forearm swinging at the elbow and my shoulders completely immobile. It wasn’t a pretty sight. (sigh) Anyways, there were no donuts at my polling place or else I may have voted with my stomach. See you at the Ross Perot, Jr. luncheon!

  4. My FAVORITE part: “and boy-howdy they really needed an undershirt or ‘bro.'”
    That’s greatness.
    Oh, and yeah, republican women are like true Texan women. We wear high heels to the grocery store, and full make-up. Dems tend to be a little more granola. They would fit in a little better in Colorado. Not to be mean.

  5. I voted right before the polls closed …after a job interview. IE… I was in my super hot pinstriped suit with sunday level makeup. Not to be vain, but I made republicans look GOOD today. Normally I keep it real when I vote and bring a little california granola goodness to the table, make them wonder if I’m a liberal infiltrator…but today I was like BAM – power vote.

    Also- just an “coolness update”. Cool women changed their mind about Obama when Tina Fey announced she was for Hilary last Saturday night.

    “Not Nice Female” is the New Black Baby. Oh SNAP!
    Except she didn’t say not nice female.

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