Top 4 Reviewed

Paula seems to be trying extra hard tonight to not make stupid comments. Did she get writers?  Perhaps she’s been coached this week.  Was that an ear piece I saw in her ear?  Maybe someone just swapped out her Coke cup right before taping… yeah, that’s it.

But she was still up and dancing like a drunken… la dee da dee da.

Also, was it just me or was the audio mix totally off? I couldn’t hear the band at all…

To the reviews…

David C

I am just not impressed by this song. He has clearly tapered off and might even be declining in recent weeks. In the past two weeks I really haven’t heard anything I was bowled over by. David A is clearly pulling in front of him in the contest of the Davids.

Syesha

She’s so sparkley tonight! I loved the sparkley dress.

The first verse of her song seemed like a waste of time and excessively slow. And why is is that I feel like she was really trying to shake it? I think someone finally told her, “check it out, you are the only girl left in the competition! so shake it!”

Jason

I Shot the Sheriff – more like, “sheriff, please come shoot me in the head.” I’m no Bob Marley fan, aficionado, or even connoisseur… but I would guess Bob never sang the song like that and probably did a triple flip in his grave. Never, ever, ever, ever sing a Bob Marley like that.. you are white bread, and you pushed this one way too hard.  It was “ghastly…”, a “massacre..”, “atrocious…” I love Simon.

“Paula… build the confidence for the next song…”

David A

I want to commend David for taking my advice and trying two more moves with his right hand above his waist line. And he was also opening his eyes… the best advice ever from Sir ALW.

But seriously, it was an awesome version – that is one tough song to sing and not make it same-ish or boring. Nice work…

Oh, and I’m with David.  Paula, when I look at you after I sing, “your face scares me.”

Best quote of round 1:

You could have whistled that song and it would have been better than the last one.

Round 2

David C

The Who: I’m slightly impressed by this song. I thought it was all right, but still off. So.. if Paula were to watch my soul, what would she see? Here’s the question… here’s what you should comment on in this blog. Paula says she was glad David let her see into his soul. So if Paula looked into your soul with her rose-colored glasses, what would she see?

Syesha

I love this song. Love, love, love, love! …And I thought she did an amazing job with it. It is a song that we will always associate with Sam Cooke, and perhaps she did a little too much back phrasing in the 2nd verse, but it was absolutely beautiful!

…Then came the tears… water, snot, everything. It was truly touching.

Jason

Wow… you need to go home. So, so, so bad. Seriously, go freaking home. You forgot like 9 lines of lyrics and it was one of the worst covers in Idol history. Come on, man. We are so over you. Stick a fork in him… cuz he’s done. Maybe you can just pack your guitar up, hop a flight to New York City, go sit in Central Park and just sing a bunch of Jack Johnson stuff – Karaoke style.

David A

… This is the man with the golden vocal chords. What can we say more than he already has done? He was the only one to get up there and blow both songs right out of the park.

Conclusion:

for one of the first times, we all agree…

  1. David A
  2. Syesha
  3. David C
  4. Jason

Epilogue:

On nights such as this evening, with stars glimmering in the distance, masked slightly by thin whips of remnants of a thunderstorm. We say to thee, American Idol, NAY! Nay to the awful waste of our precious TiVO time. We are in the top 4! We are in supposed to be going to the best of the best, hearing the best of their best. And yet we still suffer through the likes of Jason Castro’s disaster and David Cook’s mediocrity!

Please, sirs, please release us from this agony.

Thank you.

11 thoughts on “Top 4 Reviewed”

  1. Where are my guest comments you big slacker, I drove clear over to your house to bask in your AI glory…. and for what???. I have been totally dissed.

  2. Your epilogue is the key here. Last night was terrible. Very boring.

    Archuleta has an AWESOME voice, but he’s predictable and so very awkward.

    Syesha just doesn’t have any “Wow factor.” I can’t jump on her bandwagon and hope she wins because she
    is so much weaker than Jordin, Lakeisha, or Melinda from last season. Those girls could sing.

    Cook has been lame lately–bad songs and the same mic stand antics every performance. Boring.

    Castro is worse than those greasy night-time beach crooners on Waikiki that we were scared to walk past while on vacation.

    I echo you, O Sage WhiteEyebrows–Release us from this agony!

  3. OK, so may I be Paula for just a second? Because I thought Syesha looked devastatingly ravishing. And Paula, incidentally, looked as close to lucid as I’ve seen her since “forever Your Girl” was big. Did David Cook tease his hair? I’m quite certain I saw some back combing.

    Jason Castro…wow. Lay off the crack on company time.

    David Archuleta is too dang cute for his own good. He is truly “Nerd Magic” personified, but in the best sense of the words. I know of no other way to describe him.

    As for you, W.E., the epilogue brought tears to my eyes…mostly because it stirred all too vividly the memories of the painful TIVO experience that was watching AI and not even enjoying it a little bit…well, except for the part where Simon openly mocked Castro. That part was awesome.

  4. W.E., why can’t we edit our comments?!? I’ve already seen 2 spelling errors in my post and they’re hurting my eyes! OWwww. I’m like Voldemort when Harry gives him the official sizzling beat down. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. I fixed your spelling. Sorry you can’t edit your own comments. I wish other people could fix the spelling on my posts… sometimes I’m not a good personal proofreader…

  6. PHEW! Thanks W.E. I may now resume normal respiration. (That was a close one!)

  7. Oh, and PS to the Epilogue… you know that it’s a crappy show when the treats that are brought are more interesting and memorable than the performances… mmm… popcorn, marshmallows, and m&ms… who knew it could be so right.

  8. What a waste of time! So discouraging considering that the beginning of this season showed so much promise and potential. What a let down. Even I have given up on Jason after these last two performances, where did he go? Do you think he might be trying to sabotage his chances of winning AI, because let’ face it, a dreadlocked hippie isn’t exactly going to make it in his genre of choice as the american idol. That’s it, that’s the excuse I will be using to make myself feel better that my number 1 pick has been so so so bad these last few weeks.

    Syesha- I think she waited too long to find herself. I have now branded her as a just okay performer with little personality. In the last few weeks she has been trying, but in my eyes, she was already too boring. A little too late to shock America.

    David C- okay performances-no personality

    David A- the only one that has a prayer at this point.

    I really wish Brook would have stuck around a little longer, at least she brought a little personality to the table, this was one of the most boring AI’s ever.

  9. Ok I had an incredible post almost completely done at 8 am this morning and they the 19 month old hit a button and BAM! gone forever. I will just think my comments to myself I am too lazy to retype.

  10. If Jason pulls through, though, it’ll make for some very interesting television.

  11. Oh dear, Jason…go home! And I echo Tamara – no drugs of any kind on company time. Whatever Paula was taking, tho, needs to carry over for the rest of the season!
    David C is still my favorite, and I do hope he pulls it together to get back on top…

    And I’m still bitter about Brooke.

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